Friday, March 31, 2006
Seriously, if yesterday was bad, today is worst. Had 'blow wind blow', where 7 from 1 bunk changed with another 7 from the other bunk.
Purpose: To tekan us.
Reason (apparent): We're too slack

For today, was the day I laid my tears, my sweat and my blood (literally) on the grounds of my camp.

This morning, we were made to march around the parade square 4 times. In full view of recruits, a younger batch and our own batch of soldiers. It was shameful, bringing down our already 'reputable' name to shambles.

Sometimes, I really wonder why in the fucking hell I chose not to honour that fucking contract. Still pondering whether to push for my case of ezema that hopefully will get me downgraded or at least keep remainging on status. I don't see a point in doing so much work for it anymore.

One last word to all these shit that has happened in the past 2 days, fuck.


思念是一种病 {7:10 pm}


Sunday, March 26, 2006
the days are different, and morning will never be the same again, whatever is reality? Or is it just another dream, waiting for a morning to be awoken from?


decisions are but part and parcel of life. it is whether the decision we make will fulfill what we want to achieve and to the best of whatever there can be.


don't regret what i did but felt a tinge of sadness for it. shall stop kidding myself and awake from this memorable but impossible dream.


take care. love you all~~~


思念是一种病 {11:29 am}


So the last week was my final week of civilian life. Starting today, tonight in fact, have gotta book in to camp and carry on my duties as an operationally NSF. Thinking back, the past week hasn't been that bad. In fact, it would be pretty good.


Let me see, I made a new friend [= Talked for hours on the phone with a friend, got called up for an interview with SMU, bought many many books to read, learning to play "Cant help falling in love" & watching my 1st movie of the year "Failure to Launch".


So it isn't that bad afterall! Yes, I have to book in already, and at an even crappy hour of 2030 but still, everything happens for a reason. Looking forward to the week ahead? Haha. Driving's up! Woo hoo. Been almost a month plus plus since that blunder-ful day where I totally screwed up my test. Can't wait to get into that driving seat again.... Gentlemen, start your engines... Vrooooooooommmmmmmmm.........


CAN'T HELP FALLING IN LOVE


Wise men say only fools rush in
but I can't help falling in love with you
Shall I stay
would it be a sin
If I can't help falling in love with you


Like a river flows surely to the sea
Darling so it goes
some things are meant to be
take my hand, take my whole life too
for I can't help falling in love with you


Like a river flows surely to the sea
Darling so it goes
some things are meant to be
take my hand, take my whole life too
for I can't help falling in love with you
for I can't help falling in love with you


- elvis presley



Maybe it's me, but I don't know. How about just telling me straight? I'm not a master at riddles, or maybe it just isn't the right time.


思念是一种病 {12:31 am}


Friday, March 24, 2006
Am supposed to think positively after reading "Psychology of Winning" whereby it always says that there isn't time to lose, let's WIN. So thus, am 'embracing' the 'wonderful' upcoming army life 'again'.


Went to Kino to 'borrow' nurul's staff card to get that 20% off books. Bought 3 and borrowed another 3 from the Orchard library. See, uber prepared to spend lonely nights in camp again. Heh. Since army is not, or rather NEVER, going to enrich me, I must enrich myself! Shall not let myself deteoriate because of this stupid 2 years.


Reading this book that I bought previously on Personality Types. Using an Enneagram, I can classify a person into 9x2x9x9x9 = 13122 types at any particular time. Which of course I am not able to do it yet due to my novice level at it currently. The book even likens the reader, ie ME, to be like a doctor who just started out. So from all the theory we learnt, it's time to do practical examples out of it, meaning to use it on friends [= YOU!


Probably going club again tomorrow~ Haha. This time round with my class girls, they initiated it! Should be going MOS, which I have not heard any single positive feedback from that place at all.


Gonna practice e guitar. Procastinating it for too long, in fact the whole week. Thus, it's time............


思念是一种病 {8:21 pm}


Thursday, March 23, 2006
I'm sorry I didn't mean to call
but I couldn't fight it
I guess I was weak and couldn't even hide it
and so I surrender just to hear your voice
I know how many times I said I'm gonna to live with out you
and maybe someone else is standing there beside you
but there's something baby that you need to know
that deep inside me I feel like I'm dying
I have to see you it's all that I'm asking.
Vida, give me back my fantasies
the courage that I need to live
the air that I breathe
carino mio, my world becomes so empty
my day's are so cold and lonely
and each night I taste
the purest of pain.
I wish I could tell you I'm feeling better every day
that it didn't hurt me when you walked away
but to tell you the truth I can't find my way
and deep inside me I feel like I'm dying
I have to see you it's all that I'm asking.
Vida, give me back...

-son by four-


思念是一种病 {7:59 pm}


Wednesday, March 22, 2006
putting myself thru this is really painful, not wanting to tell you how i feel for fear of an unfavourable reply.


somebody save me, guessed i shouldn't have wished on a morning star, for it will not come true.


思念是一种病 {10:18 pm}


Years after I have passed on, who else will remember me? My family? My friends?


Maybe I'll see my sister getting married, having kids. My parents helping to look after their grandchildren.


Close friends of mine moving on, getting higher studies, marrying the woman of their lives, leading a happy life together.


But the future is always there for us to create. It's in our hands. Thus the future.


思念是一种病 {5:13 pm}


Tuesday, March 21, 2006
As I lay on my bed, or deathbed, I want to think about how I come into this world. So this is a brief happening from birth to now, 19+ years of age. (this is going to be looong)


0: I was born! On 17th November 1986, at around 4am which makes me a very active tiger/scorpio, supposedly.

1: How would I remember this?

2: Same as above

3: Hmmm, I dunno?

4: Argh, this is getting nowhere

5: Entered Kindergarden! I only remember it is some christian kindergarden, and I like a girl for the 1st time. Think her name was Karen, so a few of the guys would always tease her calling her carrot. =p

6: Parents changed me to another kindergarden. Some other christian one also. All I remembered was during some lesson, a few other guys and myself were comparing our bruises on our arms & legs.
The objective, to find the biggest bruise to boast about! Sadly, our comparison ended prematurely when our teachers caught us not paying attention. And so we were made to stand behind the class and to stay back after lessons. The stupid bus diver even came in and lectured us. Zzz. Dumb.

7: Primary 1! Only remembered playing arm wrestling with the guy beside me for the 1st day of school. And my parents told me off when I reached home! They were outside my class for the whole day!!
I also cheated in an exams for the 1st time! Gasp!! Pri 1, can you imagine? Haha. The girl sitting opposite me just wrote some Chinese character on those olden time white plastic ruler and I copied it! It was only 1 question but it was the highest grade I EVER, EVER got for chinese, 91. Even surpassed my other subjects, though only 2, Eng & Maths.

8: I.. I.. stole! From the bookshop, koping those stupid stickers and putting it in my bag. First, I must admit I was instigated, by some other guy. Yes. Cause I wasn't really thinking so I just followed his words.
The highlight of this was once when I was his lookout while he shoplifted at the old Sogo departmental store opposite Tamp MRT. He koped an electronic handheld game and the stupid thing was that batteries wasn't included, so we had to find somewhere that has it too. Really can't sleep well that night. Bad, bad experience.

9: Like a girl in my class! Woo hoo. So I would always wait for her outside our school's hall for her to enter and will sit right next to her, reading the exact same book at the exact same page! Wahahaha. Stupid things you do when you're young and dumb like me.

10: Got into prefectorial board! Cool.
Began going to this before and after school care, Tampines Family Service Centre, cause my Aunty is too busy to look after me and both my parents are working. Made great friends there and was of course the teachers' pet there. Went on alot of excursions and learnt alot from my experience there from P4 to P6.

11: Never really mix well with my batch of Prefects. Instead, bonded really great with my juniors, those in P3. Would usually have duty during the reading period before school starts, copying down those names who are late and who loiter around the school compound. And thus was 'promoted' unofficially to Vice Head Prefect!

12: Hopscotch was IN! And that time I was tasked to play those kuku eye relaxtion music just before recess, so I would always be the earliest down to the office to play it. Immediately after, I would pia to the hopscotch area and book 2 or 3 of the grounds. Soon after my friends would come and join and we would challenge. Sometime later those younger students will also join in and we usually team up. P6 with P4 and compete~ There's always this girl who will always choose me to be her partner! Haha. Of course I don't recall her name, don't think I even know her name from the beginning. But ya. Hopscotch! If I wasn't the top jumper, I would at least be 2nd!
PLSE! Holy! 228. Didn't really cared about results then. So it doesn't really mattered. Posted to CCHSM, where I realised many of my classmates were going to. People like Thazin, Wendy, Cynthia, Tsun Ting, Bryan, Wei Kang, and ME! Moving on to the next phrase of my life.

13: Nothing spectacular. But my form teacher was kind of disgusting. She'll usually wear those long skirts and will pull her skirt up to scratch her LEGS! OMG. DISGUSTING LA! And she has ka mo. Worst, she even has armpit hair. Eeeks. Horrible sight for a 13 year old to be put through. Luckily she's only teaching Geography.
Played Pokemon! Or rather, addicted to Pokemon!

14: Had mt 1st girlfriend! Some what la huh. Were at our class chalet and while sleeping, she was beside me, we just held hands. We weren't even very close to being with. Even went on a school immersion trip to China with her and other classmate. That proved to be our downfall. She fell instead of my roommate! Who was a year older than. So a letter from her broke off the relationship. Was very hurt and sad that I even tore up the letter to bits and totally no mood for the rest of lessons for that day.

15: Boring year. Yawnz............ Ah Ha! Travelled to Cameroon Highlands! Sadly non of my classmate went along, maybe it's good also. Stayed with 2 of my scouts friends but at the same time, made new friends on board the trip too! Like Audrey! Haha. My baby who calls me PuP? Lol.
Promoted to Senior Patrol Leader in scouts~ Yay. Highest rank for a student le.

16: Became class monitor! Gawd! Tio sabo! Arrowed! But it wasn't that bad la. Allowed me to improve my leadership skills =p
Promoted to Assistant Scout Leader! Something like Officer in other uniformed groups.
Psycho-ed by Hongye to go TPJC for 1st 3 months to 'try out'. Previously, my 4 years were spent deliberating which Poly course to enter instead. But am glad he did what he did, most meaningful and memorable for me were at TPJC.....

17: Got my 1st taste of Council work when doing Attached Councillors programme. Really liked it alot and there's no turning back from then. Ran for elections, got into council and the rest is history =]
My next girlfriend =p Heh. But it was short lived too. She got together with another guy from the class beside mine after 1 1/2 months. And also immediately after.
Went OCIP! Wahaha. Unforgettable experience I would say. Can't wait to go for another such trip when in Uni. Did things that helped others while at the same time getting to know more people! Yumei, Docras, Aaron, Aik Meng, Yi Wen, Siew Hoon, Rachel, Yee Fung... Still a number more but these are closer ones who will usually turn up for any OCIP gathering! Had a steamboat at marina south, my place, yiwen's place, drinking session at Brewerkz!, bbq at serene's & yiwen's!

18: Stepped down from Council after a successful year. Kinda sad, ok, very sad!
Pia-ing for A's. Ok, abit of pia-ing. But it was also during this time that something really wonderful happened. [[=

19: Worked at DFS for 1 1/2 months before enlisting into NS.
Some personal problems so didn't honour the contract that I signed with Navy. Thus was posted to some crappy vocation, READ: COMBAT ENGINEER (FIELD PIONEER). Didn't managed to get into OCS nor even SISPEC. Saddest moment of my life during my 1st week at 30SCE. Shan't go on about it. It's all in the past now.

20: Crap! I'm no longer a teen? My age like starts with... 2???? Argh. Two decades of alot of things.


And so here ends my 'The Past'. If you really did read all of it, tell me about it, I quiz you. If you answered all correctly, I treat you to a surprise! Woo hoo. Surprise leh!!!!!


思念是一种病 {9:30 pm}


On the MRT from Pasir Ris to Boon Lay yesterday and somewhere along the 27 stations line, think it was around Bugis, i suddenly thought of what I would like to dream just before I die. So I decided, or rather hoped, that i would dream of the following:
1. My Past
2. The Future
3. What else happens in the Present.

So I shall take 3 diff entries for each one of them. [[=


思念是一种病 {9:24 pm}


Monday, March 20, 2006
Sometimes I really wished I could be there for you.
But you shut your heart from the outside world.
I could do no more than to laugh and cry with you.
Is that what you want me to do?


Sometimes I really hoped I could be there for you.
But you dried your tears from crying over someone else.
I tried to walk beside you, to hear your fustrations.
Is that all that I could do?


Sometimes I really just want to be there for you.
But no.
Every step i take forward, you move backwards.
Is there no chance at all?


Sometimes, I just want to carry on dreaming.


思念是一种病 {6:34 pm}


Sunday, March 19, 2006
Ok, went to Cocco Latte to celebtrate a friend's birthday. 21st birthday le. Woot. Though not yesterday, but soon.


But the place is kind of small. Yup. Had almost a jug of Ribena Vodka which didn't really prove any kick. But the rest of the drinks aren't really sweet nor nice anyways.


Guess I still prefer pub. For the simple reason that I don't dance. Actually we were kept out of the club till 11pm cuz there was a private party going on inside which consists of underage CHILDREN! Ok, thus they don't want us to go in cuz they think we might serve alcholohic drink to the underage. But they were really young. 14 or 15, around there. But there were also older teenagers but just alot of ang mos. And it's quite open to all how they flirt and pick up girls.


Even in the club itself, this 2 ang mos and 2 women were switching partners and dancing with alot of body contact. Just not something I really wish to see too.


思念是一种病 {11:44 am}


Saturday, March 18, 2006
I wanna TRAVEL! Been reading Today's Traveller's page for the past and few and realised how little of the world I had seen only. Been only to like Australia, Hong Kong, China, Thailand & Malaysia? Even my sister been to Thailand, Korea, Taiwan & Hong Kong.


So was imagining myself after ORD next year, working and saving up money to travel. And to more exotic places. Was thinking of the Mediterranean. How interesting! Israel, Eygpt, or even Europe? There's even a cruise to the Mediterranean and a return flight onboard Emirates. Damn. My mouth is watering at the choices of places to travel.


Here comes the problem. Don't think my parents would really be interested to travel to places like that. My sis most likely just want to find a place to shop ie. Hong Kong. So how? Not really easy to find friends to go along also. Maybe I'll go alone! Even more cool. But never try that before. But sigh, 1 more year to ORD, so shall go fantasize on it 1st.


travel, travel, travel............


思念是一种病 {8:21 am}


Friday, March 17, 2006
Think my 'wish' of having more sweet dreams really did come true. And 3 consecutive days at it involving the same person.


They were kinda nice, but I know the chances of it even happening is like, nah. How sad.


Countdown: 1 week to Stay-In. Will people still remember me? Maybe I'll just fade away, like how it happened when I first entered NS.


思念是一种病 {10:09 pm}


Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Ten Top Trivia Tips about Jaren!

  1. If you blow out all the candles on Jaren with one breath, your wish will come true!
  2. Jaren will always turn right when leaving a cave.
  3. Until the 1960s, Jaren was not allowed to enter Disneyland.
  4. Jaren cannot be detected by infrared cameras.
  5. If you lick Jaren ten times, you will consume one calorie.
  6. Ideally, Jaren should be stored on his side at a temperature of 55 degrees.
  7. The International Space Station weighs about 500 tons and is the same size as Jaren.
  8. Jarenology is the study of Jaren.
  9. Some hotels in Las Vegas have Jaren floating in their swimming pools.
  10. Abraham Lincoln, who invented Jaren, was the only US president ever granted a patent!
I am interested in - do tell me about


思念是一种病 {6:36 pm}


Sunday, March 12, 2006
Not interested to blog about any particular subject so this post will be like what the topic mentioned.


The crowd at Suntec was crazy. It was as though the stalls were giving away free gifts. The escalator linking citylink mall side to Suntec was packed to the max. And the queue even snaked all the way to citylink mall exit. Bought a pair of in-ear earphones there, $68. Had a chat with the salesperson, pay there is pathetic. He told me it was like $30/DAY. Omg, it works out to like less than $3 per hour. And I met Christabel , who was my ex colleague from DFS, and she told me to keep mum about her $3.50/per hour. Haha.


Almost done with my "One Day In September" It talks about the Munich Olympics incident in 1972. Which I really really wanted to watch, Munich that is, but somehow plans did not go as planned. Thus the book which I bought at Kino on Thurs. And I'm already on my last chapter! So it's 2 days for that book. I like! Guess my reaing skills are still there, just a matter of whether I wanna use it or not =p It quite a good book. Learnt ALOT of it. Not only about the deaths of the 11 Israelis but also the causes and repercussions of many actions and events. Shall talk about this in another post, another time.


The effects of seeing too many bhangras and china man are starting to show. 2nd time in town and Sg is starting to be filled with blissfully-in-love couples. Maybe it's just that I'm too much of a turtle, returning to my shell everytime I come out of it. Pretty sad I would say of my current predicament. Men fills every part of my life. But going the forsaken road is not an option that I would take, ever.


Sometimes I really just wish to lie on my bed, and never wake up again. To have a wonderful dream, to sleep peacefully. To be devoid of feelings, of the real world. But I also know that that is as unrealistic as much as the chances of it happening. So please slap me and tell me to wake up.


What's the meaning of life? We were given birth to, to grow up, to reproduce and to die. So what if I were a millionaire? So what if I were a pauper? So what if I had 10 kids? So what if I die lonely? So what if I die young? So what if I die old? We all still end up the same place as equals.


思念是一种病 {1:24 am}


Saturday, March 11, 2006
Your estimated Service Balance is 369*.

Your projected ORD date is 10-Mar-2007*.


Don't know where the 4/5 extra days come from.


Not exactly a celebration, but more of a relief. Finally 1 long year has passed. And now it's time for the new batch of recruits to enter the wonderful life of army. Goodbye to your freedom, your life.


Saw and learnt many things in army that aren't really nice to say it out. But let's just say it's pretty much a waste of my time. So just another year to go! But i'm sure it's not going to be a walk in the park. Commanders always say after a year it would be better, hell no! My foot for that matter. More exercises, stupid regimentation, crappy instructions and no freedom equates to more hell upcoming.


Did I mentioned I received my nano yesterday? Cool. Going to Suntec for their IT exhibition later to see what other stuff I can lay my hands on also. Most likely going for a pair of in-ear earphones.


思念是一种病 {11:54 am}


Friday, March 10, 2006
1. Never have to enter Army.

2. Spend more time with my family

3. Spend more time with my gf, then

4. Work as a relief teacher

5. Play more games

6. Join friends for gatherings

7. Continue day dreaming

8. More sleep and slacking away time

9. Study

10. Not be for combat PES status


So there you go, the 10 things I wished I had more time to do them. But anyways, It's been a year here. And it still sucks like never before. Oh well, that's life I guess. 1 more year to go? Pray for me.


思念是一种病 {10:06 pm}


Wednesday, March 08, 2006
Didn't actually expected going for courses to be SO tiring. Never even slept late last night, around 12am after I ended my online conversation. And today at CITI, I yawn like nobody's business!


Yawn!fck Yawn!fck Yawn!fck Yawn!fck Yawn!fck


And it goes on for pretty much of the day that my friends can't be bothered anymore. For the 1st time in class I also simply, blatantly, slept in front of the teacher! Ok, it's not like I'm the only one sleeping anyway, only like 3 guys were awake? There's like 6 rows of seats and only the last row is fully occupied while the 5th row is 1/3 filled. So I'm sitting at the last row, middle section, which faces straight at the teacher and I know I am nodding off. Too tired to really give 2 hoots about it.


My new comp is starting to give me problems. Will hang during start-up unless I go into setup which is pretty dumb. Have got to call the technical spec soon to see to this problem.


Money for my iPod nano is already deducted from my account! Argh, looking forward to the next 3 days. Tomorrow, PAY DAY! Ka-ching Ka-ching! Day after tomorrow, final day of being a 1st year soldier! Day after after tomorrow, 2nd year soldier!


On Friday I will dedicate a post to my being a civilian 1 year ago on that day, which on Saturday will have a post specially to mark my 2nd year as a NS(FT) Man.


While on the way to meet cheewei,roy,sam & shiwei at starbucks, boarded 15 from my place to Tampines and there's this 2 Recruits, ok Privates, since they just had their POP today. And 2 of them, seated at the front of the bus is STINKING up the whole freaking bus. I was like, er, gross! Sweat, sweat and more sweat just stinks the whole bus. Even I, sitting at the back had to tolerate with this odour. Smelly! Maybe the Sgts back at Tekong should make sure all leaving the place has some deodourant to lessen that horrible smell. And the fact that I am saying this is because I wasn't part of them! Muahaha. I just walked back home. So no bus has my odour, I can assure.


This incident reminds me of what my friend once told me. After some stuff in camp and we were booking out in No.4, he was on his way home on a train. A person sat beside him, one-thousand; two-thousand; three-thousand, the person got up and moved to a different area to stand. And for that whole journey, no one sat within 2 seats of him. So it was like - xxPxx - x representing the empty seats and P representing my friend. Army should abolish booking out in No.4, so as to keep out public transport clean and nice smelling for normal civilian usuage.


思念是一种病 {11:04 pm}


Tuesday, March 07, 2006
There's this friend of mine, let's call him B. Well, B liked his gal in Year 1 and tried hard to jio her. However, she rejected him many times citing studies as her main piority in college. Somewhere down the line, I also encourged B to si xin on that gal ba. And so happen at the same time, another girl appears in his life. Maybe this girl is more pro active. And so, they got together.


While talking to B recently, he told me that after he broke up with the girl, sometime last year, the other gal actually confessed to him that she had liked him since Y1. And di di que que was because of studies thus she didn't want to get involved in a relationship. And so now, she's more accepting of the idea.


They aren't officially together yet, but according to him, it's all a matter of him asking the magical question. Haha. Pretty happy for him i guess, my old friend from cchs afterall.


But it did set me thinking. A girl, can like a guy, see him get together with another girl but still continues liking him up till now. Which is like 3 years already! Pretty xin fu huh. Argh. Life is unfair! And I'm used to it, like wth!


思念是一种病 {11:48 pm}


I... I... I...


BOUGHT AN IPOD! Holy macaroni! Ok, I had actually intended to surf Apple's website only, but it so happened that their online purchase is as simple as 1-2-3. You can't blame me, really! And there's this free laser engraving that is so cool. Unable to resist the iPod any longer, I clicked on BUY! And bought myself a 1GB iPod Nano for $268. It feels good, darn good!


On a side note, I'm supposed to sell my PSP before getting myself an mp3, but hey, PSP is 50% sold, now only waiting to get the money from my friend this Fri ^.^ Woo hoo! So happy with my purchase! Never really bought anything that satisfying for a long, long time already. Oh yea~~~~~




思念是一种病 {6:21 pm}


Monday, March 06, 2006
Getting a bit pissed off with my wireless keyboard. Fking hell dunno what is it's problem. Sometimes cant read my words when i type very fast thus there's pretty much errors here and there. And to top it off, I cant freaking Alt Tab! WTH!!!!! Irritating piece of sht!!!!!!


Tomorrow's an off day! Woo Hoo. Sigh. Tell me how am I going to get use being lock up in camp at the end of Mar again? Help! Maybe I could go break a leg? Or an arm?


思念是一种病 {10:03 pm}


Sunday, March 05, 2006
Went to Stonegrill for dinner. Yup, the place where Steff and Ber's working. Haha, my sister's idea though. So like it's name suggested, you cook the food yourself on a stone! So, according to Ber, "the stone is placed in an oven for 8 hours over a temperature of over 400 degrees C. Thus the stone is able to cook your food for about 45mins to an hour" So I ordered Ribeye steak, and her colleague forgot to tell me that I shouldn't cut to smaller pieces! Which I did, following my parents advise. So imagine this, 1 piece of ribeye steak, I think I cut it into 9 smaller pieces and lay is all on e stonegrill. Quite funny la. Like some small kid -_-|| Dish!


After that went to soe 777 Eating House among Ubi's industrial estate there. Went there to find my mom's old neighbour, whom she has known since she was like 10? Wow. It started me thinkin about whn I'm her age, would there still be such old friends for me to find? Pretty interesting, just to imagine 30,20 or even 10 years down the road. Meet up with pri, sec or college friends at someplace. Some would be married, some single, some with kids, some craving a career. Wonder what would I be like then? Just completed Uni studies? Working for some clinic/government? Attached? Own my own business? Haha. Only time will tell, i guess.


1 more year and 5 days to ORD! Woo hoo. Relishing the thought of getting back my pink ic, working as a relief teacher, Uni's orientation and MUGGING! Muahahaha!!!!!


思念是一种病 {10:38 pm}


Saturday, March 04, 2006
Get it? Call me a whimp, weakling, lousy, non-singaporean or whatever. But the point is I just don't LIKE chilli! Be it samba, green, red, diced or any other crap. As long as it is a subset of chilli, I simply do not take it. Maybe it's because of a childhood bad experience with chilli. Saw a small seed that resembles a saseme seed on my auntie's dining table once. So just picked it up and pop it my mouth and it became KOKO CRUNCH! Like real. It was horrible like hell. Ok, hell back then was eating chilli. It was a BAD, bad choice to put that innocent looking seed into my mouth. And I regretted it since then.


Think I was like 5/6 back then. Thus it still haunts me and I still don't consume any devilish form of chilli. I don't care if you tell me that chilli is not hot, that chilli is sweet, they are all crap. If chilli is not hot, why is it called chilli in the 1st place? So that settles it, anything with the name chilli shall never, NEVER be eaten by me.


The only exception to the chilli case is curry, not too spicy though, and black pepper. Black pepper crabs ROX!


思念是一种病 {11:45 pm}


On Friday, halfway through our lesson on painting, our instructor digressed to talking about having a mistress. So it was a construction -> moral education for us. He told us about the histroy of Muslims and why they are allowed to wed up to 4 wives. Because long time ago, when the Muslims were involved in fighting, many boys/men died. Thus those that survived were able to have more wives so as not to leave the women lonely for life. Also, the Muslims believe that as long as a woman served her Man well during marriage, regardless of how he treated her, she will find paradise in the afterlife. Therefore, Muslim man can marry 4 wives [=


Went out with mab and huiting to Glasshouse for Fish n Co.! 1st time I saw at the top tier, cause it never was open when i went there previous few times. And so we sat there, talking, eating, simply enjoying out meal. It sometimes is refreshing to just go out with friends and.. EAT! Whilst listening to their live music, it BLACKOUT! Holy YES! Never experienced it before. Then you have Singaporeans who go shouting and screaming as if they never had a blackout before in their lives. And we have like 4 people celebrating their birthdays on that day too! Cool. If it was me, I would go to the other birthday girl, duh, and ask for her number! Ahaha. Ok, lame. But anyway, God knowing it was my 1st time I experienced a blackout at Glasshouse, made another 1 happen! Woo hoo! 2 Blackouts! Beat THAT! And the 2nd one came less than 2 mins after the lights were restored initially. So we sat there, listening to more dedications, more music, all at the same time hoping for the 3rd blackout to happen. But alas, it didn't. So we paid and left =[ LOLx


思念是一种病 {8:46 pm}


Thursday, March 02, 2006
Dreaming of an impossible dream again. How stupid to think that it even was possible. It's impossible!

Hee. Silly Old Me.


思念是一种病 {10:15 pm}


Wednesday, March 01, 2006
Right now, being in a total clear state of mind. Without any regret, without any fear, without any false hopes, I write this for U.


The time we were together may not be long, but I really did only love U with all that I can give.

U stood by me as I entered NS, and even completing BMT.

U told me we'll still go strong even as U enter uni, I believed U.

We told each other to hang on, as I enter my new camp with a total culture shock.

While U stayed in hostel, I suffered in camp, waiting only for that chance to see U on weekends.

Unfortunately, my unit is involved with NDP, Saturdays burnt. By the time I get home and get to bed, it's almost 2am Sunday - book in day.

I know I must have hurt U when I told U time and again I was tired and wanted to stay at home. But I really was.

U told me U felt sick and was down with a cold one day. I really wanted to be by your side, but sadly I was in camp. All I could say was sleep early and drink lots of water.

U told me U wanted to be single again, to be without all this hopes and expectations. I expected and respected that.

U said we will still be friends, I am really glad for that.

Told me to wait 4 years, after U graduate and see how things turn out then.

Once U told me U were stressed out with schoolwork, I offered a listening ear.

But I guess time and tide wait for no Man.

Gradually U started to distance away from me. Where was the 'we'll still be friends' ?

Right now, I have fully accepted that then U had moved on, while silly old me held on to the fact that we could still talk like old friends did.

Am glad that U gave me the chance to see things in a brighter light.

Even as U ignored me.

Realised that I can't stop U from spreading your wings and soar up high.

I give U my best wishes and hope that U will find your true happiness.

U, take care.


思念是一种病 {9:21 pm}


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